CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
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I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
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My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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