i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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