so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
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yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
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the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I supernannyed him into submission
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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