we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize