My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
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she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
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barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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