so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
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I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
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Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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