my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
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I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
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I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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