How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i would punch a child for taco bell
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize