Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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