I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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