thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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