Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you just see the Batmobile???
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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