why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We talked him into tasing himself.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm bleeding and have questions
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