Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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