Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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