It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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