The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
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