I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
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no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize