They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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