Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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