Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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