I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize