I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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