I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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