i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize