You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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