Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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