If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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