eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize