Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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