just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
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I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
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