I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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