you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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