the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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