Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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