Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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