im drinking this country out of the recession.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize