Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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