a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize