Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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