her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize