That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize