sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize