okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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