so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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