I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
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When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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