i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize