got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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