I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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