So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
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I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
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Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
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